Things I've Lurnded

For the past few years, I have been writing notes in a small blue notebook, which I have called "Things I've Lurnded". Yes, the spelling is deliberate.
The first entry dates from early 2003... and, though that is a while ago, the book is NOT full. Let's just say that I have approached this project with the same fervour that I approach most of my projects, that is, not very fervent. At all! Still, some of the things I've "lurnded" have been quite funny on reflection.

Things I've Lurnded

• You can't kiss your own elbows without risking serious and permanent injury.
• You can freeze vomit. Don't ask.
• That tomatoes are actually not too bad when eaten raw. I used to hate raw tomatoes, now I love them. Basically I'm fickle.
• To finish what I start! Riiiiight. You can see I've really "lurnded" this one good.
• Job interviews can be extraordinarily weird. I applied for a job at a new supermarket opening up in the area, and the second step of the application process was more like a theatrical audition than an interview! They made us get up in front of the rest and perform an "advertisement" for a given product, presumably to see how we would interact. I did really badly. Thank gawd.
• Bananas still can't be taken seriously! One of the other bizarre job interview things was to tell everyone the kind of vegetable or animal that best described you... and this was the one I picked. Hmmm...
  
• Never forget your childhood.
• Accept your family for what it is.
• Don't eat too many cookies!
• Strength can be exploited as weakness. (and vice versa)
• The best way to solve a tricky problem is to come back to it later.
• What I lack in physical strength, I make up for with imagination.
• Don't be afraid to SPEAK UP.
• Everyone has the power to help one's self - even if that's only the power to ask for help.
• Having pets is a huge responsibility. And one few people understand...
• What "artisan" really means. I thought it meant something like an artist who worked in basic materials like clay or metal. Actually, I wasn't that far off.
• I may in fact be totally normal. Well, let's not jump to conclusions just yet...!
• Wisdom can come from foolishness.
• People with high standards of other's usually don't come up to their own.
• "Sarsaparilla" is NOT a spelling mistake! Turns out, I was always spelling it wrong, and I'll bet a lot of other people were too.
• I am really bad at following through on things!

Will post more when I feel like it!